Saturday, January 06, 2007
It's that time of year again. Normal people are quite content to get over their hangovers, pledge to start afresh and make a few resolutions. Pundits, on the other hand like to round up the big issues of the past year.
But it's even more fun to predict what's going to happen in the next. The prospect of looking back, feeling smart and saying "Told you guys, I was right!" is quite enjoyable. Yesterday, for instance, I bet my good friend Giovanni (who had just turned 35) that he would hook up with a lovely lady before 2007 was out. As I poured him his third glass of kir royal (champagne and a dash of Cassis de Dijon), I challenged him to a wager on my prediction: a top bottle of bubbly. Deal done!
But it's even more fun to predict what's going to happen in the next. The prospect of looking back, feeling smart and saying "Told you guys, I was right!" is quite enjoyable. Yesterday, for instance, I bet my good friend Giovanni (who had just turned 35) that he would hook up with a lovely lady before 2007 was out. As I poured him his third glass of kir royal (champagne and a dash of Cassis de Dijon), I challenged him to a wager on my prediction: a top bottle of bubbly. Deal done!
The editors of Lanzarote have come up with a small variation on this theme. We've selected 7 books which we hope will help our readers make sense of a handful of big events which are likely to unfold on the Maltese scene over the next year. Each event is given a likelihood rating (between 50 and 100%). Here goes!
EVENT: Lots more chatter about the Maltese Church's "Media-friendly Renaissance". There has been much talk of a crisis in values in Malta. Statistics show a 'significant' drop in Mass attendance and pundits concur that the Curia needs to brush up its act in order to entice the 'lost sheep' back into the fold. People have called for Mass 'to be made more appealing for young people', for sermons to address 'today's issues' and for more pop music in ceremonies. Without actually pointing any accusatory fingers at taciturn Mgr Guzeppi Mercieca, most folks have welcomed his 'friendly, approachable' successor, Mons Paul Cremona. Journalists from across the media spectrum appear to have been wowed by his 'down to earth', 'very human' and 'kind' manner. We too wish him the best of luck.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 100%
BOOK: Gesu' Lava Piu' Bianco by Bruno Ballardini. So as the Maltese Church embarks on its new media-friendly journey, one could do worse than read Bruno Ballardini's book which shows that, far from being a novice in this field, the Roman Catholic Church is the institution which has employed some of the most effective and intrusive marketing techniques in the history of Western civilization.
EVENT: Minor skirmishes between conservatives and liberals on "the abortion clause", divorce and gay rights will continue in earnest. They will be largely drowned out by 'more pressing matters' such as getting elected. Progressive Labour will NOT commit political suicide by shouting too loudly on any of these issues. Divorce will be introduced in 2013, gay marriage in 2030.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 80%
BOOK: Modern Liberty and the Limits of Government by Charles Fried which contains the stunning lines: "The greatest enemy of liberty has always been some vision of the good. It might be the good of community engaged for the glory of a city, nation, race, or party."
READING THE FUTURE
EVENT: Lots more chatter about the Maltese Church's "Media-friendly Renaissance". There has been much talk of a crisis in values in Malta. Statistics show a 'significant' drop in Mass attendance and pundits concur that the Curia needs to brush up its act in order to entice the 'lost sheep' back into the fold. People have called for Mass 'to be made more appealing for young people', for sermons to address 'today's issues' and for more pop music in ceremonies. Without actually pointing any accusatory fingers at taciturn Mgr Guzeppi Mercieca, most folks have welcomed his 'friendly, approachable' successor, Mons Paul Cremona. Journalists from across the media spectrum appear to have been wowed by his 'down to earth', 'very human' and 'kind' manner. We too wish him the best of luck.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 100%
BOOK: Gesu' Lava Piu' Bianco by Bruno Ballardini. So as the Maltese Church embarks on its new media-friendly journey, one could do worse than read Bruno Ballardini's book which shows that, far from being a novice in this field, the Roman Catholic Church is the institution which has employed some of the most effective and intrusive marketing techniques in the history of Western civilization.
EVENT: Minor skirmishes between conservatives and liberals on "the abortion clause", divorce and gay rights will continue in earnest. They will be largely drowned out by 'more pressing matters' such as getting elected. Progressive Labour will NOT commit political suicide by shouting too loudly on any of these issues. Divorce will be introduced in 2013, gay marriage in 2030.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 80%
BOOK: Modern Liberty and the Limits of Government by Charles Fried which contains the stunning lines: "The greatest enemy of liberty has always been some vision of the good. It might be the good of community engaged for the glory of a city, nation, race, or party."
EVENT: The rise or fall of Alternattiva Demokratika. Labour would like to convince you that the country desperately needs a change, commonly known as "Il-Bidla". While honest, depressing blogposts like those of Immanuel and Arcibald are painful testimony to the current stagnation, impartial people everywhere know that the change Labour has in mind won't exactly represent a cultural revolution. The real question is therefore "Are there enough Maltese people who're fed up (and bored) with the current scenario?" To be honest, we're not really sure.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 50%
BOOKS: The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell which explores "that magic moment when ideas, trends and social behaviours cross a threshold, tip and spread like wildfire" and Politics by Adam Thirwell which is not about politics but tells the story of a menage a trois.
EVENT: The island succumbs to Eurovision fever once again. Journalists are dispatched to Helsinki. A spot of controversy erupts over wardrobe malfunctions. Toni Sant predicts that a Russian group called Poledance Pravda singing the catchy, raunchy 'Strip Strip Baby' will be crowned winners.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 99%
BOOK: Nul Points by Tim Moore. The blurb says it all: "The spangled inanity, the stubborn reinforcement of crude national stereotypes, the scoreboard shamelessly corrupted by cross-border frienship and hatred...throughout those long post-ABBA decades, the Eurovision Song Contest has been drawing us to the sofa for all the wrong reasons. And somewhere amongst the Austrian power balladeers, hand-jiving Latvians and Maltese electro-folkers, lurks the most gloriously wrong of all: our enduring fascination with the unfortunates left to wander the lonely, windswept summit of Mount Fiasco without a point to their names."
EVENT: Maltese bloggers become increasingly influential and determine the outcome of the next election. NET television and SuperOne close down, Lou Bondi and Peppi Azzopardi crumble beneath the weight of the competition. Avant-garde MaltaToday grudgingly acknowledges that it's not 'The Only Liberal Voice in The Village'. Restaurant critics stop calling bloggers whippersnappers (which according to The New Oxford English Dictionary is "a young and inexperienced person considered to be presumptuous or overconfident").
LIKELIHOOD RATING: 5%
BOOK: The Blog Digest 2007 - Twelve months of the best writing from the web (edited by Justin McKeating). An interesting selection of around a hundred blog articles written by some of the best bloggers in Britain on a variety of topics from War to Politics to Sport to Culture and Media.
EVENT: Salvu Balzan stops dissing Brussels and Malta's Permanent Representative RCC and is spotted frequenting some of the capital's top restaurants accompanied by...who? You guessed it - RCC. Restaurant critic I.M. Beck joins in the fun.
LIKELIHOOD RATING: depends on the weather
BOOK: Cool Restaurants Brussels (edited by Eva Raventos)
¶ 8:43 AM
