Kitsch Tout est kitsch, si l'on veut. La musique dans son ensemble est kitsch; l'art est kitsch, la litterature elle-meme est kitsch. Toute emotion est kitsch, pratiquement par definition; mais toute reflexion aussi, et meme dans un sens toute action. La seule chose qui ne soit absolument pas kitsch, c'est le neant.

(La Possibilite d'une ile)  ¶ 9:20 PM 1 comments

  Lanzarote Quiz LANZAROTE QUIZ

J’Accuse, an innovator if ever there was one, came up with the first Crossword Blog while Twanny brilliantly perfected the idea with his own mind-bloggling Tisliba Kriptika which had even the most linguistically canny among us scratching their heads in sheer dismay.

Now Lanzarote is proud to present the first:

Are you a fascist (F), a member of the liberal elite (LE) or simply a clueless bastard (CB)? Read on and find out.

This quiz comes at a time of great social upheaval in the proud island nation of Melita. Our well-being is under threat. Hysteria is rising. External influences, globalization, Europe, Africa and internal discontent threaten to rip our homeland apart. It is time for YOU to choose!!! Are you a fascist, a member of the liberal elite or simply a clueless bastard? As usual there’s no other choice. Take the quiz and find out NOW!!!

The ANR is:
a) God’s Gift to Our Nation
b) Diametrically opposed to Christian belief
c) This must be a trick question.

You think Philip Beattie is:
a) A modern crusader knight. Orlando Bloom, be afraid!
b) Le Pen in sheer camouflage
c) An Everton player who scored against Chelsea

Which phrase best describes “Graffiti”?
a) “Left Wing Monsters”
b) Rebels with a cause.
c) Blokes who sell tight jeans and Che Guevara t-shirts at City Gate. I bought one once.

Mark Montebello:
a) should simply get a life
b) is a modern day martyr. Pity he’s also a priest
c) Mark who?

Malta in 2005 is a country:
a) ravaged by the pernicious stench of liberalism
b) heading towards totalitarian doom
c) strategically placed between Sicily and Libya. It has a sister island called Gozo. Beer is cheap.

A “foreigner” of dark complexion asks you the way to the public library. You:
a) send him in the opposite direction. He he!
b) take him there yourself, missing your 10am appointment with your lover in the process.
c) admit you’ve got no bloody clue where the public library is.

You describe your principles as:
a) Dio, Patria, Famiglia (and proud of it)
b) Marx, Darwin, Freud (with a dash of Guevara)
c) Juve e basta!

Are you a racist?
a) Erm. No, but…
b) No comment
c) Ma nafx

How would you describe “multiculturalism”?
a) The Maltese are a pure race. Full stop.
b) A mind-expanding experience. A bit like an LSD high, man.
c) Jien kontra l-EU!

Your number-plate is:
a) DVX 007
b) CHE 069
c) JUV 001

Where will you be in 10 years’ time?
a) MEP for the ANR
b) MEP for the Tamil Tigers
c) MEP for anyone mate. Good job, good pay and you get to meet Lou Bondi when he’s in Strasbourg.

Results:

Mostly "As": Congratulations! You are indeed toying with fascist ideas which have, among others, led to severe brutality and awful architecture. You have excellent chances of being elected to the European Parliament in 2009 if current trends persist.

Mostly "Bs": You're just a poncy wannabe intellectual aren't you?

Mostly "Cs": Congratulations! Never was there a time when "ignorance is bliss" applied with such vigour! You will be entirely immune to Xarabank audiences debating immigration, letters to the editor bathed in prejudice (or coated in biblical quotes) and to the slow but painful sight of a complex issue torn to shreds by a lynch mob salivating for some action. Just sit back, sip that Cisk and get high on Sky Sports.  ¶ 7:33 AM 2 comments

  Edward de Bono

With a wink to Jacques and to Fausto Majjistral.


Letter to the FT, July 9th, 2004

Millions of ways you can clothe your intentions
From Mr Jamie Delargy.

Sir, Edward de Bono thinks there are 39,916,800 (or factorial 11) ways you can put on 11 items of clothing ("Creativity is an option for every business", July 7).
That is surely too many permutations unless your dress sense allows you to put on underpants over trousers. Apart from Superman, I know of no one who does this.   ¶ 8:16 AM 0 comments

  Are you a geek? Fil-Waterstones ta' Hampstead, fuq l-istess mejda ma' 50 crappest towns in Britain u Worst Holiday Destinations, sibt ktieb, forma ta' questionnaire, li l-iskop tieghu hu li fl-ahhar il-qarrej jiskopri jekk huwiex denju tat-titolu "geek" (jew ubergeek, jew geekmeister skond il-puntegg li jtella').

Il-ktieb jinqasam f'diversi temi: Hobbies (kelma eminentement geeky), Opinions, Dress sense, Eating Habits, Entertainment u ohrajn. Insibu, fost l-ohrajn, puntegg specjali ghall-uzu ta' dawk il-famuzi emoticons:

:-) ................. 1 geek point
:-( ................. 2 geek points
;-).................. 4 geek points

Jinghata ukoll puntegg gholi hafna ghal qarrejja ta' Terry Pratchett li jirreferu ghall-awtur favorit taghhom bhala "that genius Pratchett", ghal persuni li akkwistaw il-box-set shih ta' Lord of the Rings, ghal nies li ilhom ma jahslu l-lozor aktar minn xahar (3 punti) u ghal dawk li juzaw "FYI" fl-emails (1 geek point) u f'konversazzjoni normali (3 geek points). Hemm ukoll skeda ghal dawk li ghadhom jghixu mal-mummy, in direct proportion to age.

Is-sabiha hi li kulhadd kapaci jtella' puntegg ragjonevoli ta' geek points bla ma necessarjament jiehu t-trofew ta' ubergeek jew geekmeister.

Nipproponi li nibnu kompendju sabih ta' sitwazzjonijiet geeky li niltaqghu maghhom. Per ezempju l-editur tat-Times u s-Sunday m'hemmx dubju li ghandhom track record tajjeb hafna ghar-rebh tat-titolu ta' ubergeeks fil-kategorija 'Journalism'.

Many young people, especially those from Northern countries, who visit Malta either on holiday or to study English, or both, are often amazed at the seemingly unrestricted access which their Maltese contemporaries, or younger, have to beer, wine and alcohol.

It is a moot point whether any country can adequately prepare itself enough for a natural calamity or disaster.

Nistenna bil-herqa l-kontribuzzjonijiet taghkom.  ¶ 5:26 AM 13 comments

  Borza cips
Sfortunatament naqra zghira l-istampa tal-qoxra ta' dan il-ktieb helu ta' Yves Le Manach li jismu "Le fritisme", li bil-Malti nahseb naqblu tigi "Ic-cipsizmu". U b'hekk inzidu "-izmu" iehor wara s-socjalizmu ta' Salvu Sammut u l-faxxizmu ta' l-ohrajn. Is-sottotitolu tal-ktieb huwa Cips, tribalizmu w identita'. Is-sintezi tal-ktieb tghid hekk: "X'nifhmu bil-kelma "cipsizmu"? Moviment belgjan li ghamel tieghu c-cips, b'argumenti fazulli nazzjonali-storici-kulinarji. L-awtur jizvela lid-dinja kollha din il-gidba storika." Fil-fatt Le Manach isostni li c-cipsa hija Bretonne.

Il-karattru fl-istampa qed jghid: "Qrajtuh l-ahhar rapport? Ic-cipsa hija Bretonne. Resqin lejn kunflitt kbir fl-Ewropa. Nghaddu ghall-pjan ta' periklu. L-armata lesta..."

Nahseb jithajjar jixtrih sehibna l-gybexi li llum hareg b'din il-metafora fuq il-blogg ta' Mark:

Antoine, tipprovax tifimha lill-Daffni - hi mara intelligenti u li taf tikteb imma l-intelligenza taghha sfortunatament qisha l-frites (jew ic-cips) ta' Bertu's Takeaway - fejn il-frites huma l-intelligenza u z-zejt hu x-xaham ta' l-'ismlizzar' u pregudizzji tipikament haughty u pretenzjuzi tal-pepe.int trid ic-cippa biss imma ser issibha indurata u tqattar biz-zejt tal-pregudizzji...  ¶ 6:27 AM 1 comments

  Bay Street Instinct Qorti, 'Bay Street' jipprotesta dwar kalendarju ta' nisa għarwenin
Awtur: Karl STAGNO NAVARRA
VALLETTA - Il-kumpannija li topera l-kumpless Bay Street f'San Ġiljan ippreżentat mandat ta' inibizzjoni fil-Qorti kontra Sunflower Promotions Ltd dwar it-tqassim jew bejgħ ta' kalendarju bin-nisa għarwenin. Dan peress li l-kumpless Baystreet jidher fl-isfond ta' wieħed mir-ritratti. L-operaturi ta' Bay Street qalu li saret taf b'kalendarju bl-isem Amour Calendar 2006 Scantily Clad View of Malta li qed jitqassam f'diversi ħwienet f'Malta. Huma sostnew li l-kumpless Bay Street għandu fama ta' post għall-familja kollha. Bay Street Holdings Ltd u Bay Street Hotel Complex Ltd qalu li matul is-snin bnew ċertu goodwill iżda l-kumpannija Ingliża li produċiet u ppubblikat il-kalendarju kienet qed tkisser din id-dehra tal-kumpless kollu. Jirriżulta li l-kumpless jidher fl-isfond ta' ritratt għax xahar ta' Frar 2006 u quddiemu tidher mara għarwiena. L-operaturi sostnew li l-aġir ta' min ippublika u qed iqassam il-kalendarju hu illegali u abbużiv u għalhekk talbu li jingħataw ħlas għad-danni li sofrew.  ¶ 8:20 AM 3 comments

  Reasonable Politics I have never doubted that the reasonable politics which Jacques is advocating should be the way forward.

However, I often ask myself whether what people actually want is a bit of excitement - the fire-and-brimstone approach, the controversies, the marches, priests knocked off pedestals, the insults. As DCG put it this week, a bit of street theatre. The MLP's "reasonable stance" on Europe must have left a number of people (from both sides of the fence) feeling bewildered, let's face it. The rapid shift from confrontation and insults (remember Verheugen's tongue?) to embracing the former enemy could have left a vacuum which is now being filled by the "more exciting and immediate" Lowells and Beatties of this world. It's far from certain that the "reasonable" AD has benefitted in the same way from the fall-out.

These snippets from this BBC report on the elections in Norway throw an interesting light on what "boring politics" might look like:

The UN has ranked Norway as the most prosperous country in the world for the fifth year running. But, as Lars Bevanger suggests, there is always a downside to paradise.

Norway is the third largest oil exporter in the world .The election official from the governing conservative party looked a bit bewildered. I had just asked him why his party was trailing in the opinion polls a few days ahead of the general election here, when everything in this country is going so well. His blue eyes searched the cloudless sky for a possible answer. "Unemployment is low," I prompted him, "interest rates are at a record low, the UN keeps telling us we live in the best country in the world. Yet people say they want the Labour party back in power?"
When the heavens failed to provide him with an adequate answer, he looked back down, shrugged his shoulders and said: "Well, maybe people just want a change." I do not think anyone can possibly understand how boring a general election in the world's best country really is.

There simply is not much left here to fix and, for one tedious moment earlier this week, it seemed the main debate between the political left and right would be the price of petrol, which is higher than normal in this country, too, these days.

Well, maybe when I have had enough of politicians arguing over the price of petrol or the queues of baby prams belonging to mothers enjoying their 10-month, full-pay maternity leave.
For now though, I am enjoying my extremely expensive pint and, like a typical journalist, hoping someone might uncover a political scandal in time for Monday's parliamentary election.   ¶ 4:08 AM 1 comments

  Tajjeb li tkun taf (2) Nifrah lill-President Salvu Sammut, lis-segretarju generali Tony Zarb u l-membri l-ohra tat-tmexxija l-gdida. Nawgura li kemm huma, kif ukoll l-ohrajn kollha li kkontestaw ghall-karigi jkomplu jaghtu konribut shih lill-kawza tan-nies tax-xoghol f’pajjizna. Il-haddiema ghandhom bzonn tat-talenti kollha tan-nies tar-rieda tajba biex nilqghu ghall-isfidi u l-problemi li qed jiffaccja pajjizna.

(Alfred Sant, it-Torca, 9/10/2005)  ¶ 5:13 AM 1 comments

  Faut-il avoir peur du populisme? Snippets from A.N.R's website:

...we at A.N.R. and the public in general will never bow to hypocritical attempts to muzzle us where our sovereign rights are at stake, on the contrary if necessary next time we will be five thousand and the time after that, ten thousand until the 97% of the population that expressed their disapproval of illegal immigration and called for immediate action are finally heard.

Yesterday we have set a precedent, we have demonstrated that on issues where our National Interest is at stake we have it within us to UNITE above partisan politics to safeguard our fundamental rights as a People.

...Since yesterday our website has been literally inundated with subscriptions and mails expressing interest in the A.N.R. and its ideals.

Snippets from article by Alexandre Dorna (Le Monde diplomatique, Maniere de voir no. 83, Oct-Nov 2005)

Le populisme est surtout un phenomene de transition, eruptif et presque ephemere, qui se developpe au sein d'une crise generalisee et d'un statu quo politico-social insoutenable pour les majorites. Il s'agit d'une sonnette d'alarme, d'un avertissement bruyant et baroque plutot que d'une explosion qui emporterait tout sur son passage...C'est une reaction de colere et de mefiance a l'egard des institutions et face aux forces centrifuges qui menacent les mythes fondateurs de la nation.

C'est son caractere "pluriclassiste" et transversal qui le rend capable de traverser les clivages politiques classiques.

Si le populisme n'emerge pas ex nihilo, c'est parce qu'il est associe a une situation de crise de societe et a la presence d'un syndrome de desenchantement. L'immobilisme des elites au pouvoir entraine le statu quo politique. La croyance dans la nation se fissure. L'avenir provoque la peur. La doute se transforme en silence complice...

La presence du populisme est assimilable, mutatis mutandis, a un acces de fievre. Et si la fievre est symptome de maladie, elle n'est pas, en elle-meme, la maladie.   ¶ 1:31 AM 0 comments

  E-mail to Harry Vassallo Dear Harry,

The situation is critical, since, as you say, it is "a country" which is deeply racist. Not the politicians, not the leaders but the people. Or, at least, from what I sense, a large proportion of the people.
This crisis calls for fundamental thinking and debate. Not just about this issue but about where we've gone wrong as a people. Debate is crucial and possibly the lack of real debate in the country is one of the causes of this ugly development. Your party has the credentials and track-record to be instrumental in this debate while young people should NOW stand up and be counted. They must write, debate, engage in politics. A few young people are attempting to challenge the status quo via a new, and interesting medium: blogging. Many important voices (yes, most of them living abroad already!) are voicing their worry, shock and anger as the situation develops. I feel the time has come to make our voice heard louder and I am sure that most of us will modestly attempt to do our bit.
Best regards and kuragg
David  ¶ 8:39 AM 1 comments

  Great timing

'1565 the Musical', part of the Malta Historic Cities Festival

Title roles:

The Butcher of Benghajsa - Salv Sammut

Grand Master La Vallette - Philip Beattie

Lowell, an Anglo-Saxon warrior - Norman Lowell

Cultural attache and master of letters - Lorna Vassallo

  ¶ 7:13 AM 0 comments

  Gonzo (not Gonzi) Journalism










Hunter S. Thompson - the King of Gonzo Journalism. His major book - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. A description: Destruction and decadence are only one tangent of the book; in between the fits of comic mayhem. Get it now Zemploid?

I was going to simply answer my old class-mate, brand-new blogger Zemploid, in his blog.

But I thought that Malta in 2005 is a gonzo journalist's paradise so why not blog about it. It's all falling apart innit? Liberal elite freedom fighters engaged in pitched battles with the loony right wing majority, foreign influences threatening the moral backbone of the country, Russian and black prostitutes sapping the remaining life-blood of Catholic Malta like vampires, Socialist die-hards in bed with Norman Lowell, Portes des Bombes defaced again. A return to populism.

Destruction and decadence. In between fits of comic mayhem.  ¶ 2:36 AM 2 comments

  Toninho Cerezo
Magica Roma
Campioni d'Italia 1982-1983

Jacques' Palio dig following Roma's terrible defeat at the hands of modest Siena and Rizzo's trip down Super Hero lane brought back memories of many things.

It's all about the time I reluctantly (already then!) returned to Malta after three blissful years in Oxford (snowmen in the University parks, Guy Fawkes' night, playing Atari computer games at James Bannister's place, my first girlfriend, Elizabeth (aged 5) and watching Italy beat Germany in the 1982 World Cup Final at Andrew and Louise Muscat's house and NO HOMEWORK AT ALL).

Grade 3 Stella Maris College was the destination. Jacques' mum was my first teacher in Malta. And a good one too. Rizzo, although not in the same class, was also knighted "a Blue" which meant that our fate was sealed as the winners of every single football tournament and relay race at Stella Maris College.

And now for a small admission of guilt - I was a Juventus fan for about six months (Platini was playing for them after all). Until Roberto Pruzzo, Paolo Roberto Falcao, Franco Tancredi, Agostino di Bartolomei, Seba Nela, Bruno Conti, Ubaldo Righetti, Odoacre Chierico won that great campionato. There was no turning back. With hindsight, of course, it would have been wiser to stick to the team from Torino which has dominated Italian football over the past 20 years in the most unforgiving manner (especially in games against Roma). But strange things happen to a boy's mind when he falls in love with a team. I mean does anyone remember Toninho Cerezo being the most exciting sticker in the calciatori album? (apart from Tufigno and Soler perhaps...)

It's been a painful ride with the occasional moment of sheer extasy. But I wouldn't change it for allegiance to La Vecchia Signora. Anyway, I don't have a choice, do I?  ¶ 9:44 AM 2 comments

  It's all gone Pete Tong
Don't you get the distinct impression that it's all gone Pete Tong?
(excuse the Cockney)


The crowd booed, jeered and swore at Fr Mark Montebello, who held a poster questioning whether the demonstration conformed to Christian values. A Graffiti Movement banner proclaiming that The Real Threat Is Racism also provoked the crowd's wrath.
The Graffitti members and Fr Montebello insisted they had a right to take a stand in the light of an "immoral" demonstration that "attacked the sacred values of society".


"We cannot be split over a national issue which is of concern to all of us Maltese," he said as the crowd waved Maltese flags and placards with messages such as We Don't Want a Multicultural Society, Let's Defend our Country and Solidarity with Our Police and Army.
"We appeal to all those against us not to call us racist. We are proud to be Maltese and we just don't want to become the toilet of the Mediterranean," he said to a deafening applause. He insisted that ANR was inspired by Catholic values and its motto reflected Maltese roots: faith, nationhood and family.  ¶ 4:12 AM 0 comments